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| Soap Writer |
I decided to write a program to automatically generate a story, and simulate a soap opera. They're predictable things, after all. The text I have put up here are the episodes of the soap opera generated by the program.The Leafy Suburbians - Introduction
The story begins in a small suburb, best left unnamed, in July 2003. Margaret and Peter Grundlebury, respectively a wealthy councillor and car salesman, have a son called Nathan. Nathan attends the local school. Jimmy and Marjory Wyomi, a Thai couple, have a daughter called Sarah-Beth. Dave Anderson is morris dancer who was an alcoholic mechanic until his liver failure and the death of his wife, The Late Mrs. Anderson. The local crime-fighting team come in the form of Jessica Fletcher and Jack Grouter, a soldier in the Vietnam war. The town has a homeless orphan called Jezabiah Raeoulgh. William Hawthorne is a lawyer who moved here with his daughter from the city some years ago. Finally, Anne Smith is the local doctor.
Episode One
Sally Hawthorne and Jezabiah Raeoulgh have been friends for years. Sally Hawthorne realises one day she is attracted to Jezabiah Raeoulgh. Sally asks Jezabiah on a date. They have a good time, and end up in love. Jimmy Wyomi performs an autopsy on The Late Mrs. Anderson to determine the exact cause of death.
Episode Two
Jezabiah Raeoulgh thinks Sally Hawthorne is 'the one'. He proposes to her, and she says yes.
Episode Three
Jezabiah Raeoulgh and Sally Hawthorne have an engagement party. Sarah-Beth Wyomi congratulates the couple.Episode Four
October, 2003. The big day has arrived. All the friends and family of Jezabiah Raeoulgh and Sally Hawthorne gather at the local church. Nathan Grundlebury is the best man, and Sarah-Beth Wyomi is the head bridesmaid. Jezabiah Raeoulgh and Sally Hawthorne are married. Anne Smith decides to go for a short walk. William Hawthorne is driving home.
Anne Smith tries to cross the road, only to be knocked down by William Hawthorne. William Hawthorne rushes out of the car, and discovers she is dead.Episode Five
Jack Grouter, the town cop, investigates William Hawthorne, and discovers he killed Anne Smith. Jack Grouter arrests William Hawthorne. Peter Grundlebury knows William Hawthorne is feeling unhappy and takes William Hawthorne for a walk in the park. They have a great time. Jimmy Wyomi performs an autopsy on Anne Smith to determine the exact cause of death.
Episode Six
Jezabiah Raeoulgh gets a loan from the bank, and opens a greengrocers on the high street. Margaret Grundlebury needs a vegetable, and goes to Jezabiah Raeoulgh, the greengrocer, to buy one.Episode Seven
Sarah-Beth Wyomi decides to open a butchers shop on the high street. William Hawthorne goes to the butcher's shop. Sarah-Beth Wyomi does not have quite what William Hawthorne wants, so William Hawthorne loudly declares that the shop is rubbish. Sarah-Beth Wyomi is angered. Jack Grouter, the town cop, investigates Sarah-Beth Wyomi, and discovers she killed William Hawthorne. Jack Grouter arrests Sarah-Beth Wyomi. Sally Hawthorne gains a large inheritance from William Hawthorne's will. Jimmy Wyomi performs an autopsy on William Hawthorne to determine the exact cause of death. Sally Hawthorne decides to open a butchers shop on the high street. Jack Grouter goes to the butcher's shop. Sally Hawthorne does not have quite what Jack Grouter wants, so Jack Grouter loudly declares that the shop is rubbish. Sally Hawthorne is angered. Jimmy Wyomi performs an autopsy on Jack Grouter to determine the exact cause of death.
Episode Eight
Margaret Grundlebury needs a vegetable, and goes to Jezabiah Raeoulgh, the greengrocer, to buy one. Nathan Grundlebury decides to open a pub in the centre of town. Peter Grundlebury needs a beer, and goes to Nathan Grundlebury, the pub owner, to buy one.
Episode Nine
Peter Grundlebury needs a beer, and goes to Nathan Grundlebury, the pub owner, to buy one. Jibby The Donkey decides to go for a short walk. Marjory Wyomi is driving home. Jibby The Donkey tries to cross the road, only to be knocked down by Marjory Wyomi. Marjory Wyomi rushes out of the car, and discovers he is dead. Jessica Fletcher knows Marjory Wyomi is feeling unhappy and takes Marjory Wyomi for a walk in the park. They have a great time. Jimmy Wyomi performs an autopsy on Jibby The Donkey to determine the exact cause of death.
Episode Ten
Dave Anderson needs a beer, and goes to Nathan Grundlebury, the pub owner, to buy one. Jessica Fletcher decides to go for a short walk. Jimmy Wyomi is driving home. Jessica Fletcher tries to cross the road, only to be knocked down by Jimmy Wyomi. Jimmy Wyomi rushes out of the car, and discovers she is dead. Jimmy Wyomi performs an autopsy on Jessica Fletcher to determine the exact cause of death. Dave Anderson decides to go for a short walk. Jezabiah Raeoulgh is driving home. Dave Anderson tries to cross the road, only to be knocked down by Jezabiah Raeoulgh. Jezabiah Raeoulgh rushes out of the car, and discovers he is dead. Nathan Grundlebury knows Jezabiah Raeoulgh is feeling unhappy and takes Jezabiah Raeoulgh for a walk in the park. They have a great time. Jimmy Wyomi performs an autopsy on Dave Anderson to determine the exact cause of death. Peter Grundlebury decides to go for a short walk. Margaret Grundlebury is driving home. Peter Grundlebury tries to cross the road, only to be knocked down by Margaret Grundlebury. Margaret Grundlebury rushes out of the car, and discovers he is dead. Margaret Grundlebury is devastated by the death of Peter Grundlebury; she will never get over it. Margaret Grundlebury is deeply saddened by the death of Peter Grundlebury. After grieving, she realises life goes on. Jimmy Wyomi performs an autopsy on Peter Grundlebury to determine the exact cause of death.
Epilogue
And so most of the cast had died at the hands of The Rule Of Unexpected Death. The few survivors were Sarah-Beth Wyomi, Sally Hawthorne, Jezabiah Raeoulgh, Jimmy Wyomi, Nathan Grundlebury, Margaret Grundlebury and Marjory Wyomi.
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